Sometimes, you have to say “No”

One of the shortest word in the English language is “NO.” That simple, two-letter word can also be one of the hardest to use when we need to most.

If we are honest with ourselves, most of us probably have a problem when it comes to saying “no.” When we are asked to do something, we feel an obligation to say “yes,” even though we may be filling our calendar too full. Whether it is our boss or coworkers or our family, we have a hard time saying “No, I can’t do that right now.” We have varying reasons for not saying “no,” but sometimes, it simply comes down to the fact that we don’t want to let anyone down.

We believe (or at least I know that I believe) that if we tell someone “no,” they will see us as unreliable and we will lose their respect. In reality, though, we are more likely to lose their respect and be considered unreliable if we fill our calendars and lives to the point that we can’t follow through on the things we agree to.

Saying “no,” especially to family, close friends, and in work settings, is difficult. But we must remember that we have to take time for ourselves, to say “yes” to our own health, both mentally and physically. There is a saying that goes around social media periodically that says “You can’t fill from an empty cup.” As simple as that phrase is, it has a deeper meaning when we apply it to our lives. Basically, our lives are a cup that is filled each morning when we wake up. Each time we say yes to one of the millions of things someone needs done, we, in essence are using our cup to fill others up. What happens when our cup becomes empty? That is when mental health concerns start creeping in.

Take time to fill your cup up. Take yourself out for a night on the town, take a long, relaxing bubble bath, or whatever else may give you a break from being the “yes man” for others. And remember that it is ok to say “no” to others from time to time. When you do, you will be able to say “yes” to yourself, and everyone will be better in the long run.